The Holidays were lots of fun, and now I'm wearing all the cream cheese, and other fat/sugar-filled goodies I ate and drank over the season. I promise you, I can see blocks of cream cheese on my thighs and butt (sorry to those of you who are visual).
It's time to fight the bulge, and I am feeling motivated. I have been exercising more, and eating more figure friendly foods. I have never been good at losing weight, yet being tall has enabled me to carry extra weight and not show every pound of it. Honestly, the battle of the bulge has been a long standing one in my life, one I have had to stop obsessing over, and just live. This year I feel a bit different though. I want to lose at least 25 lbs. to put me back at the weight I was as a youth. I feel I could do Weight Watchers or something like that, if necessary without obsessing. I have until Feb. 1. If I haven't lost at least 3 lbs. by then I will bite the bullet and join online Weight Watchers. I SO don't want to do that, but I also SO want to lose weight. We'll see...
Over Christmas I had a heck of an ear infection. I went to the Doctor and he irrigated my ear. WOW! Never had that done. It wasn't gross, and not too much junk came out of my ear, but after the procedure - I felt like something was loose. I think something in there ruptured. Since this Saturday, I have been having these dizzy spells along with anxiety. It's dumb!!! I'm not given to anxiety, and can logically look at my life and see no reason for fear. I was having panic/claustrophobic attacks at red lights, then feeling like I was going to pass out. Strange! I had a date with my younger brother arranged earlier this week, and knew he was looking forward to going. I didn't want to break the date, and didn't want to be unsafe. I sat down with my Bible and read verses about anxiety and fear, then spent time in the shower praying. I could feel myself almost going into the panic feeling at red lights, but was able to redirect my attention, and not feel any of the panic stuff. The Lord was faithful, and I had peace.
In the wake of all of this, I have had suspicions that my thyroid meds were too high because I was feeling very jittery. I didn't take any meds yesterday, and went on with my normal routine. I still felt jittery. Had labs run. Levels are good. Medication is just right. I decided to cut coffee out today and didn't feel the jitters at all. UGH!!! You see, I have been drinking coffee daily for about 14 years now. YIKES! I love coffee, and even had to have a cup of decaf this morning. I am thinking that if I can make these decisions to give up the things I enjoy so much, maybe it will strenghten my ability to say no to snacking at night, and falling into the pits that keep me from being the trim self I want to be.
I have had themes for the past several years. Things I felt the Lord wanted me to work into my character. This year I feel impressed with the Fruits of the Spirit. I guess Self-Control is a great place to start. Thankfully it is a Fruit of His Spirit, and not something I have to muster.
I look forward to where all this leads over the next few months...
7 comments:
I hate that your still having your anxiety. I've been praying for you.
We can do this weight thing!!!
It IS nice that we don't have to come up with self-control (et al) on our own, isn't it? And although my anxiety is more of a slow burning kind, rather than a swift onslaught, I find it encouraging to think that when the enemy comes in like a flood, it's the Spirit of God who raises up a standard against him.... it's not me.
I will pray for you Stace!
I live about an hour from Portland and an hour from the ocean.I am glad you are feeling better. I am on this weight loss journey with you.
Thanks to you both!
Yolanda,
Welcome to the journey!
We visited friends in Tupelo a couple of yrs. ago. Loved Mississippi. We also liked Memphis.
So do you think the coffee was causing the anxiety/panic attacks? I know caffeine is not our friend, but is that normal? Jitters yes, but panic? Wow! I just put my 2nd cup down over that one! (Okay, so the first one was at 8:00 - there's been time between them.)
No, I truly believe the panic thing was claustrophobia. I've had it since an MRI a few yrs. ago. I don't let it fun my life, but it is very real for me. I have been fine since Tuesday. I have this inner-ear dizziness going on, and think that having that, plus being in the car caused claustrophobia that made me feel anxious.
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